The Last Straw

All things happen for a reason. The reasons maybe absurd and you can't possibly accept it but there is a reason. That's the way it is. I used to think that life for me was well off and i was practically covered since birth whether it's the clothes i wear or the school i go, the food i eat and everything else. But as i grew older, I realized that the reason behind all this so-called luxurious gifts my parents give me, they work day and night and not a single complain. No words. No matter how tired the day is, they'd come home with a smile on the face and made sure we spent quality time as a family. 

However all good things come to the end. 

And safe to say after tonight's incident, I don't presume to look at things the same way anymore. I realized no matter how much I try to change for the better, it's never enough. And no matter how many times I'd voice up my opinion and my thoughts, I stand corrected. Again. Again. Again. Again. 

Lyrics from *Beautiful Disaster by Jon Mclaughlin*

She prays one day she'll find someone to need her

She swears that there's no difference between the lies and compliments

It's all the same if everybody leaves her. 

I could use a shoulder but then again, i can't help but wondering how long can this shoulder be around for me. When i took the first kick, the only thing that was going through my head was how could possibly someone do that to another. Especially when its family. 

My chest hurts, the outer layer of my skin may be covered with bruises and it'll probably take a couple of months to go away but the cut, the scar left in me and my memories, it'll stay forever. 

But I wont give up. At least, not yet because I know that I did nothing wrong and I still have faith in myself. I won't break this easy. Not another time. And this is a promise I make to myself. The next time this happens again, im walking out. And no turning back. 

For now, I shall heal within the darkness in my room with the music on my Ipod. I shall creep back into my own little solitude world where no one can find me, where I can be myself and have a little taste of sanity. Even if it's just a little.